the third sex

A friend emailed me during the week to say that he had heard of a ladyboy pageant in the Philippines that featured very young ladyboys, between the ages of 13 and 16. Did Thailand ever hold similar beauty contests for the youngsters, he asked. I wrote back to say that I didn’t know of any event like that, but that I had no doubt they did take place in the local communities, probably as an offshoot of the ladyboy pageants that are held at temple fairs and by the media and commercial organisations countrywide.

Given the enormous number of young Thais who decide pre-puberty and during adolescence that they are going to become ladyboys, it would be surprising if such events did not take place.

Although many in the West would raise their hands (and voices) in horror at such an activity, it is probably worth pointing out that ladyboy pageants are harmless. As most are staged in temple grounds or municipal facilities, they would hardly be anything other than that.

The pageants are all about dressing up, rather than dressing down, and the emphasis is on glamour, dancing, singing and theatrical performance. These are not bikini contests: the girls wear beautiful costumes. In fact the pageants are usually sponsored by beauty product companies, hairdressing salons, boutiques and so on.

Apart from providing a colourful spectacle for those attending (temple fairs are enormous fun for all the family) the pageants are an essential part of network building amongst the nationwide ladyboy community. I remember years ago having my first experience of this, when I went down to the Deep South and attended a temple fair. There were a great number of ladyboys there, and it soon became apparent that they all knew each other, they all knew friends of friends, they all knew ladyboy-friendly employers and they all knew places that were looking for staff.

In other words, it was a huge support network. And these networks link with other regional networks. It is possible to visualise a vast ladyboy network spreading across the entire country.

So yes, of course the youngsters get a look in. No one would want to encourage any young person to become a ladyboy, but given the reality, at least a support network exists. And I have no doubt that there are plenty of words of warning handed out by the older ladyboys to the young and impressionable kids who might think it’s all glamour and money.

I keep in my apartment a supply of schoolgirl white socks. My maid buys them and I put them away with the other props until such a time as a young ladyboy who would look good as a schoolgirl arrives for a shoot. There is something transforming about white socks. As long as a model is small and fine-boned, the socks will enhance her appearance. I think it adds to the sense of vulnerability. A model dressed only in white socks, and nothing else, is a tremendous turn-on.

Finding very young looking ladyboys who would look good in one of the schoolgirl uniforms I have is something of an obsession. There are plenty of them out there, of course. And many of them really are still at school, or at college. Some arrive wearing their own uniform, although if I photograph them I have to be careful about badges and buttons, so I prefer using what I have in store.

College uniforms in Thailand tend to be standard: a black skirt with a white blouse. But the high schools use a variety of standard patterns, with only the private schools having their own-design uniforms. So the tartan skirts and ties and the blue-and-white uniforms you see on some models on the site are authentic enough, purchased by my ever-loyal maid from a standard high-street supplier.

In fact, the real uniforms are far more exciting than the creations you find in the sex shops in London. I have gone looking for uniforms at outlets such as the Ann Summers store in Oxford Street, and not only are the prices sky-high, the selection is poor and the designs depressingly bad. Click onto any of the sex shop websites and you will see what I mean. So I stick with the real thing.

This business about dressing ladyboys for a shoot is an interesting one. In recent months I have tended to stay with the street clothes the model was wearing when she arrived. This, in the main, is because they have been wearing visually pleasing gear. There was a time a while back when everyone – EVERYONE – turned up in denim jeans or a denim skirt. That became very tedious. But denim seems now to have gone out of fashion, I’m happy to say.

So nowadays I await the arrival of a new model with some anticipation. I have already briefed my scout to tell her to wear something she likes, and although some turn up looking a bit frumpy, others display a real dress sense. In Bangkok you can buy very fashionable clothing at the markets for dirt-cheap prices. The textiles are normally pretty good, either local or from China, and the mass fashion business is a large and creative one. In fact, many ladyboys find employment in that business, as designers or vendors.

But, as I say, it is white socks that do it. So simple, so transforming.

“Ah, Khun Captain,” said the general manager of the hotel, with the kind of enthusiasm he might have experienced seeing a new pimple on his face when looking into the shaving mirror.

I have been using his hotel for photoshoots for the past five years. He knows what I get up to in his rooms. But I never frighten the horses, I’m smiling and friendly to his staff, and I’m a regular customer. Business is business.

How’s your occupancy rate right now, I asked him as I checked in.

He shook his head. “Bad,” he said. “About 20, 25 percent.”

That is bad, certainly, although I know of leading hotels in Bangkok with less than that, and I have heard of at least two who in recent weeks have had zero guests. None. Zilch.

I went for brunch last Sunday at a very well-known hotel in the centre of town, and there were only two other people in the restaurant. I know of hotels that are laying off thirty percent of their staff.

The political crisis here has devastated the tourism industry, and the global economic crisis has done the rest of the damage. Thailand always bounces back quickly enough from the Thais’ unfortunate propensity to shoot themselves in the foot, but given the dire state of the international markets, this time there is no real end in sight to the misery that the Thai hotels are currently experiencing.

As I sit here writing this, there is news that government troops have opened fire on Red Shirt protestors. The Red Shirts are insisting that the government dissolves itself and that the prime minister leaves the country. When I came home yesterday afternoon, Sukhumvit Road was locked solid with traffic, there were pickups full of Red Shirts, and the police were out in droves.

I couldn’t get a taxi, so I hopped on a bus. The ticket collector said the rides were free that day, presumably to help mobility in and out of the crowded zones. She warned me about the jams, but I live in a part of town that is not affected by the uprising. I got off the bus at the Klong Toey port district and, as there were still no taxis around, I hopped on another bus that took me home. Actually, the entire journey was quicker than my usual taxi ride.

You might think this is not a good time to visit Thailand. You would be very wrong. As far as foreign visitors are concerned, you are as welcome here as ever. The strife is solely a Thai affair. Stay away from the trouble points, where you might get mixed up in the crowd, and you would scarcely be aware anything was wrong.

Hotel rates have never been so low. Visit Thailand now, and you will get marvelous deals. Low rates, three nights for the price of two, free upgrades and so on.

And also, of course, the entertainment venues are suffering. Visit one of the Bangkok ladyboy bars, and you could well be the only customer. The girls are anxious for any business they can get. The customer is king. That means you.

For the past few weeks I’ve been making a point of asking ladyboys who work in the bars about the level of business. Many customers coming to your bar, I ask. No, they always say, Very, very quiet right now.

Bangkok and Pattaya are hard hit. Phuket is not suffering quite so badly, as it is perceived as being far away from the domestic political turmoil, but things are still very slack down there.

So! Book your flight now! Whatever else you were planning on doing for your summer vacation, drop your plans and come to Thailand!

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My ladyboy friend Jeab was in a high state of hilarity, hugging herself as she sat on the chair, laughing fit to bust. What have you been up to now, I asked her sternly. Jeab is a true friend, a Chiang Mai girl, funny and bright and sexy, and a tonic to be with.

Eyes sparkling, she told me. She had just been with a man from one of the Middle Eastern countries. The man had thought she was a genetic girl. In the hotel room she had turned the lights right down, but she had been nervous.

But Jeab has a neat little trick. She has a long cock, and she can pull it back tight between her legs and wedge it in place by tucking it into the crease below her bottom. The result, front on, is a neat triangle of pubic hair with a cleft that looks exactly like a vagina. She can stand like that, even with her legs apart, and her dick stays in place. When she decides to let go she just gives a little wriggle and her cock swings down into position. She has often treated me to this party piece of hers, and it really is a sight to see.

Anyway, her customer, who had had a couple of drinks and wasn’t functioning too clearly, obviously saw nothing amiss. Jeab had lain invitingly on her back and while the customer fumbled with a condom she had applied KY Jelly to her bottom.

She covered her cock with her hand, and the customer, not seeing what he was actually doing, had unwittingly penetrated her bottom. When it was over, Jeab had gone straight to the bathroom, showered and dressed, and emerged into the bedroom. The customer, still convinced she was a genetic girl, had paid her. Then both parties, mutually satisfied, had parted.

“So funny! Him think I real lady!”

Has this ever happened before, I asked her.

“No! I never try fool customer. Maybe they get very angry. Too dangerous. But he little bit drunk, not very experienced with lady I think. I see him at bar, he say I beautiful girl, want me very much. I say cannot. But he say, come hotel, never mind, can talk. Soon as get in room he take off he pants. No want talk! So I turn big light off. I worried. But everything okay!”

She became thoughtful.

“I never do again, though. I lucky this time. Maybe not next time. No need pretend be girl. Plenty customer want ladyboy.”

I have seen other ladyboys who can do the dick trick, but it does need a long one. Some ladyboys who are well endowed sometimes strap themselves up with sticking plaster, but it can leave a sticky residue when removed and even cause lesions and pimples. Another trick to hide large bulges is to wear two pairs of pants, the outer ones often resembling cycling shorts. A ladyboy wearing a cotton dress or frock will often wear a pair of cotton or denim shorts underneath.

I once met a ladyboy who had an enormous dick, but when it was at rest it could be hidden completely by a tiny g-string. Of course, ladyboys with smaller dicks seldom have a problem in hiding them.

Personally, I like to see a girl whose panties are almost bursting open, but I do have to admit that a ladyboy walking down the street with what looked like a tent pole under her dress would be a bizarre sight.

I was photographing a ladyboy the other day, and when her pants came down she proved to have an enormous great bush of glistening black pubic hair. There was no hair on her bottom, or her balls: it was only on her pubis. I really have a thing about pubic hair. A great thick warm fragrant mass of it is to me a turn-on. Those who follow the photosets on the main site will know that I often get in a couple of early shots of pubic hair poking over the tops of panties, before the pants come down to reveal everything. I enjoy doing those tease shots.

As with several other aspects of sexuality, we tend to take pubic hair for granted, assuming it is more or less the same for everyone. Of course, it is not. I see ladyboys with little fluffy patches of hair, and with fine hair, and with coarse hair. Thais of course have black hair, but sometimes I find a light-skinned ladyboy who actually has soft light-brown pubic hair.

Quantities vary enormously. Some have only a little V-shaped growth. Others have a thick tangle, with a long line marching up towards the tummy button. Sometimes it spreads between the legs and continues around the base of the bottom. It fascinates me.

Some ladyboys trim their hair. On one occasion not long ago, I found one case where the ladyboy had dyed it blond. Actually, it looked very appealing against her dark brown skin. Sometimes of course you have ladyboys who shave their hair off. This can be immensely attractive if the girl has a very big dick, but if she is not very well endowed then the effect can be disappointing. Plus of course the hair grows back again very quickly. A ladyboy with pubic stubble is NOT attractive.

A while back I had a regular ladyboy friend, and I had the idea of snipping off a lock of her pubic hair and keeping it in an envelope. The idea was, I would take it with me when I travelled overseas, so that I could remind myself of her. But it wasn’t very effective. All it was was a tuft of black hair in an envelope, and I didn’t need actually reminding because she was in my mind day and night. Eventually, I lost the envelope. (I also had the idea of her cumming over her panties so that I could keep them as a reminder, but I need hardly add that dried, week-old cum is not the most exciting memento to have.)

A good, thick, black, heart-shaped growth of pubic hair makes a beautiful frame for a strong ladyboy cock. A creamy load of cum makes the hair wet and shiny. Rub your face in it. Yum!